Aug 24, 2015

What do you want out of your life?

In The Circus of Lost Dreams, Nin Andrews and Emily Lisker become a magical duet. The two share an insatiable, tender, and wry imagination. Their poems and paintings together are profound in their insights regarding power, male/female relationships, and spirituality. ”
— Denise Duhamel

Dear life... I am ready now!

I realize to an outsider (someone who doesn't know me personally, only what they see online) I may come off as miserable tragedy girl. However, I am NOT. I am actually incredibly resilient! I feel things deeply and it is because of this that I often need to offload my pain and problems onto this blog. I'm a firm believer of getting things out of me and not letting them festering and distill into a deadly intoxicant. The best way for me to not plague other people with negativity nor to dump on the people who hurt me which really doesn't accomplish anything yet to hold it all in is unhealthy for me so I write it all out. I sit down and I let every single thought and feeling, no matter how pathetic or irrational, pour out and keeping pouring until I have nothing more to add to it... THEN IT IS DONE and I can move on!

Nothing written here in all its sappy stench is how I still feel! Why do I not have many blog entries of positive inspiring stuff? Because that I actively share and express with the world around me. That is the radiant glow that attracted you to me so do not read this journal as a way to get to know me. Wait until perhaps you have fallen in love with me and from a place of love need to know what has tragically happened to me and then you will see the light of my survival and the joy I bring despite of these things. 

Namaste, dear friend. I am the part of you that loves you. Do you see me?

Dialogue be damned

Whenever I reflect upon my short comings, paranoid thinking due to incidents of abuse in my formative years that shattered my trust, and the...