Dec 31, 2010

psych! oh..

Big Five Word Test Results
Extroversion (87%) very high which suggests you are overly talkative, outgoing, sociable and interacting at the expense too often of developing your own individual interests and internally based identity.
Accommodation (47%) medium which suggests you are moderately kind natured, trusting, and helpful while still maintaining your own interests.
Orderliness (50%) medium which suggests you are moderately organized, structured, and self controlled while still remaining flexible, varied, and fun.
Emotional Stability (50%) medium which suggests you are moderately relaxed, calm, secure, and optimistic.
Inquisitiveness (58%) moderately high which suggests you are intellectual, curious, imaginative but possibly not very practical.
Take Free Big Five Word Choice Test
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Personality Disorder Test Results
Paranoid |||||||||||| 42%
Schizoid |||||||||| 34%
Schizotypal |||||||||||||||||||| 82%
Antisocial |||||||||||||| 54%
Borderline |||||||||||| 50%
Histrionic |||||||||||||| 54%
Narcissistic |||||||||||||||| 62%
Avoidant |||||||||| 34%
Dependent |||||||||| 34%
Obsessive-Compulsive |||||||||||| 50%
Take Free Personality Disorder Test
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My Jung/Myers-Biggs personality type ~ENFP:
outgoing, social, disorganized, easily talked into doing silly things, spontaneous, wild and crazy, acts without thinking, good at getting people to have fun, pleasure seeking, irresponsible, physically affectionate, risk taker, thrill seeker, likely to have or want a tattoo, adventurous, unprepared, attention seeking, hyperactive, irrational, loves crowds, rule breaker, prone to losing things, seductive, easily distracted, open, revealing, comfortable in unfamiliar situations, attracted to strange things, non punctual, likes to stand out, likes to try new things, fun seeker, unconventional, energetic, impulsive, empathetic, dangerous, loving, attachment prone, prone to fantasy

favored careers:
performer, actor, entertainer, songwriter, musician, filmmaker, comedian, radio broadcaster/dj, some job related to theater/drama, poet, music journalist, work in fashion industry, singer, movie producer, playwright, bartender, comic book author, work in television, dancer, artist, record store owner, model, freelance artist, teacher (art, drama, music), writer, painter, massage therapist, costume designer, choreographer, make up artist

disfavored careers:
data analyst, scientist, researcher, financial adviser, business analyst, govt employee, office manager, mathematician, investment banker, office worker, computer tech, it professional, network engineer, strategist

tests from

Dec 27, 2010

spirit lust

As the dancer whirls, she chants in a strange, slow voice, quickening as she goes: Lo! I gather up every spirit that is pure, and weave him into my vesture of flame. I lick up the lives of men, and their souls sparkle from mine eyes. I am the mighty sorceress, the lust of the spirit. And by my dancing I gather for my mother Nuit the heads of all them that are baptized in the waters of life. I am the lust of the spirit that eateth up the soul of man. I have prepared a feast for the adepts, and they that partake thereof shall see God.

Dec 15, 2010

for my grandmother

My mom's mother, Christine Mercer, has lived the past 16 years with Alzheimer's disease (life expectancy following diagnosis is approx 7 years, less than 3% live more than 14) and is in the final advanced stage and will hopefully slip away in her sleep very soon. Technically she most likely will die of starvation/dehydration as she is unbelievably healthy otherwise but has now forgotten how to swallow and feeding intravenously at this point is practically inhumane (many in this stage often die of infected bed sores etc.. to no fault of any caregiver, anyone who is willing to offer care is purely a saint)

With a red hat which doesn't go, and doesn't suit me.
And I shall spend my pension on brandy and summer gloves
And satin sandals, and say we've no money for butter.
I shall sit down on the pavement when I'm tired
And gobble up samples in shops and press alarm bells
And run my stick along the public railings
And make up for the sobriety of my youth.
I shall go out in my slippers in the rain
And pick the flowers in other people's gardens
And learn to spit

You can wear terrible shirts and grow more fat
And eat three pounds of sausages at a go
Or only bread and pickle for a week
And hoard pens and pencils and beermats and things in boxes

But now we must have clothes that keep us dry
And pay our rent and not swear in the street
And set a good example for the children.
We must have friends to dinner and read the papers.

But maybe I ought to practice a little now?
So people who know me are not too shocked and surprised
When suddenly I am old, and start to wear purple.

Taken from the book ~ When I Am An Old Woman I Shall Wear Purple
Edited by Sandra Martz Papier Mache Press--Watsonville, California 1987

Oct 6, 2010

I've become digitally numb

How often have you gone back and reread something you wrote and discovered while trying to edit it to make more sense, at least you thought.. but you actually left a cut/pasted section somewhere that trails into nowhere smack in the middle of a cohesive train of thought? I do it a lot! Of course I'm not that worried about it because I assume no one's judging me as incompetent for the flaw. It's obvious what happened and nobody whatsoever actually thinks I typed the sentence that way intentionally or my brain unraveled momentarily and I failed to realize I had an incoherent/incomplete thought but probably I overly thought it and got caught up in the small stuff, details, words that is, or tense (as in past tense, present etc), person/perspective which I'm apt to do I admit. I like to laugh it off and joke that I can be OCD about things sometimes.. another one that I often use just like all of you who scour the internet do too is "ooh.. shiny" or ADHD. Sometimes I'll even complain about anxiety and often I am certain that I have fallen into a state of depression. Why? Because I can never live up to all the expectations I have for me! I can't even keep up with all the emails I'm expected to read/reply on top of the texts/calls/comments etc. I can't even seem to finish writing a blog, get off the computer, shower, and get out the door to go do something like I want or intend to half the time because there's a million things in between distracting me and I seem to think they're all necessary for my attention to drift to momentarily because my mind is a bottomless pit like a stomach that can continuously digest information and only become more stimulated and strengthened in the process... IT'S NOT TRUE! NONE OF IT IS TRUE! IT'S NOT FUNNY TO HAVE A PSYCHOLOGICAL DISORDER! IT'S NOT OKAY BEING LATE ALL THE TIME! AND I'M DEPRESSED BECAUSE I'M ISOLATED TO THE EXTENT THAT MY BODY SUSPECTS IT'S ARMAGEDDON FOR REAL AND MIGHT IMPREGNATE ME HERMAPHRODITICALLY IF THE ONE PERSON AROUND ME IN PERSON WASN'T MY BF whoops, didn't mean to scream that. heh. sorry. um. here watch this: seriously something to think about! if you have time and can focus long enough that is? I couldn't. had to go write a blog instead. fuck. that really sucks I think.. ooh! look ~ shiny!

Aug 11, 2010

First Gift - Ancestry

According to Plato in "The Myth of Er" the first gift is a person's spirit is allowed to choose the setting/conditions of one's incarnation that might best allow him to be able to learn/discern between good and evil. The Egyptians believed though one's soul may go on after death his Ka, daimon, or essence never dissipates but stays here on Earth and is assimilated into the collective unconscious in some parts known as the genii. In ancient Rome it was believed that the genii resides within the ancestral bloodlines which is why each clan had a coat of arms showing the unique features of 'the family genius'.  As a magician/student of the A.'.A.'.  I'm finally finishing up my old Probationer homework here as referred to in Cornelia No. 6 so off I go on my ancestral voyage for you to yawn at like I did to C93 until you're ready for your own journey or whatever you will...

Image Source,Photobucket Uploader Firefox Extension

The story of this remarkable and durable clan goes back to the tenth century when a chieftain held a fortress in the Jura Mountains, and continues to the 1600's when descendants were forced to flee across Europe to avoid martyrdom for Calvinist beliefs. The succeeding flight to America brought new adventures, a unique form of government, treaties with the Indians, and at last refuge in a tiny settlement on the banks of the Wallkill River in the shadow of the Shawangunks.

Image Source,Photobucket Uploader Firefox Extension The Huguenot Cross
One of the oldest streets in America with several of the original houses of twelve seventeenth century Huguenot refugees from religious persecution in Europe was designated a National Historic Landmark in 1964. The Historic Landmark is located in the middle Hudson valley in the town of New Paltz, New York. Two of the twelve Huguenot refugees were Christian Deyo and his son Pierre. Pierre built the first stone House on Huguenot Street in 1692 and it stood for 200 years in the rural Flemish Style of all the Patentee abodes until it was remodeled into a Victorian mansion in 1894.
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More to come of the older world...

Aug 10, 2010

ambiguous sabbatical

what is internally wield exponentially and
wrought by infinitude of sole intensity will be
wrung of ubiquitous uncertainty so to be seen 
when reeled from the myriad of misery
wells an eternal soluble mystery...

But we speak the wisdom of Eloah
in a mystery that was hidden
And [that] Eloah had before separated
from before the ages for our glory.
That not one of the authorities of this world knew,
for if they had known it,
they would not have crucified the Adon of glory.
But as it is written:
The eye has not seen, and the ear has not heard,
and into the heart of a son of man has not entered
that which Eloah had prepared for those who love Him.
(1Cor. 2:7-9 HRV)

"Life is understood backwards, but must be lived forwards." -Kierkegaarde

May 28, 2010

life on mars

Personal Daily Horoscope - Astrodienst

I dreamed this morning that I was helping my new soon to be domestic partner (fictional) move in when the axle on his truck broke and the trailer came unhitched and collided w/the front of my building shattering glass.. We went in for a little bit to get a number, make a call etc. then someone knocked on the door and said to get out, now! Then I watched from the street along with other single neighbors spread out around me as the whole building collapsed 9/11 style dropping to our knees and letting out wails to various degrees according to our attachments to our belongings and our willingness to accept life altering.. I let go of everything trusting the universe to embrace me but my kitty is my responsibility, my familiar so I ran towards it to see if I could get her to come to the window as the ground level gave way to the debris on top of it and cave in...

Horrifying! and perplexing! without the astrological reference explained in the link above!! ASTROLOGY MAKES SENSE OF THE MYSTERIES, FOLKS ;) I'd truly be baffled without it, indeed. Today Mars in my 4th house & the Moon is conjunct my natal Neptune which is opposed to Mars near my rising = emo dreams about home.. Dreams are symbolic sketches of the psyche and is astrology is the language of these symbols as our psyche adapts to the perpetually changing environment it exists in constantly...

So yay.. On with my day ~ AMDEF! I'd almost rather die than go to Heaven but I must express my disdain on stage, I guess.. so I will! It's gonna be epic.. always! everyday! to entertain the masses & be a catalyst for scientific illumination of the human race aka joy!


May 17, 2010

Modern Egyptian Ritual Magick: The Opening of the Mouth

Modern Egyptian Ritual Magick: The Opening of the Mouth

May Ptah give me voice, remove the wrappings! Remove the wrappings which the lesser gods have placed over my mouth.

Come unto me Djewhty, bearer of Heka, full of Heka, remove the wrappings! Remove the wrappings of Suti which fetter my mouth.

May Tem turn back those who would restrain me.

Give me voice! May my mouth be opened by Shu with that divine instrument of iron with which the gods were given voice.

I am Sekhet! I watch over the heaven of the west.

I am Sakhu! I watch over the souls of Annu.

May the gods and their children hear my voice, and resist those who would silence me.





I am the flame which shines upon the Opener of Eternity!

May 1, 2010

REM-Sweetness Follows

Readying to bury your father and your mother,
What did you think when you lost another?
I used to wonder why did you bother,
Distanced from one, blind to the other?

Listen here my sister and my brother
What would you care if you lost the other?
I always wonder why did we bother,
Distanced from one, deaf to the other.

Oh, o, but sweetness follows

It's these little things, they can pull you under.
Live your life filled with joy and wonder.
I always knew this altogether thunder
Was lost in our little lives.

Oh, oh, but sweetness follows.
Oh, oh, but sweetness follows.

It's these little things, they can pull you under.
Live your life filled with joy and thunder.
Yeah, yeah we were altogether
Lost in our little lives.

Oh. Oh. Ah.

Oh, oh, but sweetness follows.
Oh, oh, but sweetness follows.


YES, PLEASE!?!? TIME IS NOW there is no other one for me nor for you because that's too silly and we were always solid you know me like the rain to the river to the ocean and we carry angels like they carry us back home... o sir us i ador e sis

Apr 3, 2010

there's a crack in the vault of heaven

Astrologers can manipulate time?!?! 

Nah, but Alexander perhaps... (?!) .. This guy's just an idiot like all the rest of shepherds who are blinder than the flock they think is following their directions instead of itself:

The difference between Sidereal Astrology and Tropical has NOTHING to do with the SEASONS.. It doesn't matter whether it's Spring or Fall when the Sun enters Aries anymore than it matters whether it's day or night.. the Sun is still in Aries whether it's too bright to see its neighboring stars. The major difference between Tropical and Sidereal Astrology is whether you follow the calendar like it's a road map of the intergalactic freeway and cruise control is effective OR whether you navigate sea of space by the stars still!!! See just like the planet tilts 60 degrees as it revolves around the sun each year our whole solar system does as well while it revolves around the galactic center.. it's called a wobble yeah? Well guess what you'd find out if you pulled out a boat transit and looked at the constellation maps?? THE CALENDER IS OFF BY 23 DEGREES!!! So.. now ya understand why we're breaking so many weather records this year!? How long have we been keeping record of the weather anyhow hmm?! About 2300 years or so perhaps? So there's @1 degree variation every hundred years or so and/or not 365 days a year. Wonder what else we haven't been bothering to pay attention to......  Sheep. Bah!

Mar 24, 2010

ignition - Asraiya spins Fire at Heaven

   Me doing just a freestyle/improv staff spin to a dj's dubstep set last Thursday night while hanging out with Ignition at Heaven celebrating NUG's birthday... Stuff's hard to dance to! Stay tuned for more with me and Ignition as well as Spinergy Arts is about to re-enter our gig season too ~  

Igni Natura Renevatu Integra!

Mar 22, 2010

my name's a double 'He'

Exodus 3:13-15
(13) And Mosheh said to Elohim, "See, when I come to the children of Yisra'el and say to them, ‘The Elohim of your fathers has sent me to you,' and they say to me, 'What is His Name?' what shall I say to them?"
(14) And Elohim said to Mosheh, "I am that which I am."(1) And He said, "Thus you shall say to the children of Yisra'el, 'I am has sent me to you.'" Footnote: 1The Hebrew text reads: 'eyeh 'asher 'eyeh, the word 'eyeh being derived from hayah which means to be, to exist, but the Aramaic text here in v. 14 reads: ayah ashar ayah. This is not His Name, but it is an explanation that leads up to the revelation of His Name in v. 15, יהוה namely.
(15) And Elohim said further to Mosheh, "Thus you are to say to the children of Yisra'el, 'יהוה Elohim of your fathers, the Elohim of Abraham, the Elohim of Yitshaq, and the Elohim of Ya'aqob, has sent me to you. This is My Name forever, and this is My remembrance to all generations.' 

Wow! Crazy! That's what I heard on top of the mountain known as "Herb of the Rock" or the property of Afri-I in NE Washington state where I was staying to study Rebirthing in November of 1997. I asked Great Spirit for my true name, the name of I who will or my Holy Guardian Angel incarnated in the flesh to do the Great Work here and now... Certainly not looking for the name of the most holiest holy but that which describes the holiest part of me! Suppose they are one and the same? Interesting epiphany about the modern Christian interpretation of the Bible and how God is thought to be a He or strictly a masculine archetype well He as in YHVH is feminine and translates into either the mother or the daughter as in those of the Earth who the Annunaki fornicated with and begot the sons of Earth... My birth name btw is Heather :)

That which has been will be. That which is done is what will be done and there is nothing new under the sun.

Mar 13, 2010

dire straits


  Well I'm not going to pitch my case here and now about the empathic pre-cognitive skills I possess and have had to deal with since I was in my early 20's.. as a matter of fact the more I learn and understand about astrology the less inclined I am to even bother trying to explain anything and just know and accept my road map as one of particular perplexity of which such traits are a given... So for the past 24 hours I've been ill at ease, a feeling I'm well acquainted with at this stage to be another one of those premonitions that I can never quite explain nor point a finger towards the source exactly until it fades away completely and then various reports find their way to me eventually so that I can piece it all together and confirm my intuition in a most unsatisfactory retrospective claim. Did that even make a lick of sense to anybody? No expectations! All I'm trying to say really is that I've been plagued with a bad feeling, not necessarily devastating but a painful sense of insecurity, isolation, and loss that is not 100% my own but either that of someone who is close to me but not at present is suffering emotionally or perhaps it's not so attached to me personally but instead on a larger scale which is why it's struck such an intimate and deeply vulnerable place within me because it's more universally shared.. and then it could be a betrayal aimed at me directly and so I've already begun to detach and disassociate myself as a defense mechanism. I'm almost positive that this New Moon in Pisces will deliver some sort of news that's hard to accept and bear! Soon too I  believe because it's been dissipating rapidly ever since the Sun came up the last hour or so... Yeah it sounds crazy but I don't really care what you or whoever thinks about me because it doesn't change it one bit whether you dare to believe or judge me with or without waiting to see if there's a reason I went out on a limb just now! I still have to recognize and reconcile with whatever the hell it is that I feel and right now it's completely isolated and utterly alone while standing in the middle of  about a million people...

Feb 28, 2010

Surviving the Sick N Twisted Fashion Show

I let myself get a little down for the last hour or so because I am once again alone. I like being around people.. I'm a very social person who's claustrophobic. Dichotomy. That's been the word of the day.. or polarity and thus paradox. Success is always tempered... but the show must go On!

I'd say I certainly felt the full spectrum of emotions while working on this event. From pure elation to total breakdown.. all at once tonight even. I've never felt so dignified and utterly humiliated, proud and humble, surrounded and alone. The show was Brilliant!! Btw... heh :)

I was a model. I did both terrible and fabulous.. I was insecure and confident, nervous and calm... Love hurts! I love the work that I do but it hurts that I'm not paid much for my time and effort. Where does the love go? It doesn't seem to come back all that much... One more time with feeling? I feel too much!

I'm gonna write way more about this event and my experience as Model Liaison.. how much was involved in the planning of it. For now I'll just say EPIC

One week later 3/7:
.. with whole lot of deep self reflection and a bit of aftermath observation from a nice eagle eyed vantage point instead of sitting poolside or teaching kiddie pool wrestling classes at the Y to the next future go go dancing girls of america... I honestly have very little to say at all for American Gothique Magazine and hypothetical production company attached because I realized a lot of been there done that and have zero interest in repeating old high school glory days! I played "Alice" my senior year (in Wonderland) and I did the yearbook staff my sophomore year for some reason but it was kinda cool how I appeared to be about the most popular girl in my whole class that year but it was only the fact that I got to know the intensely shy quiet introverted boy who'd let me hide out with him from all the other stupid shit in the darkroom where images appear and everything else dissolved into fumes that don't care... I truly understand if you haven't had a Disney Princess moment and need to know that you truly are queen of your very own snowglobe.. by all means every girl deserves that! Just don't ever play poking games with guys in your scooby clan.. I repeat NO ROCKING THE MYSTERY MOBILE swear!? Not pimp unless you're into Austin Powers b&d humiliation.. oh and never trust a pirate but duh that's a no brainer.. I sound like Buffy the Vampire Slayer? Beware the ides of March and with that I'm just gonna *poof* DISAPPEAR woo hoo for rose tinted smoke & mirrors! :P

ciao x

Feb 22, 2010

ryleigh ia! ia!

my playlist on ... iz pretty :)

be sure ya hit the visualizer k

Feb 11, 2010

cthulhu causing confusion

Christ, I dunno what's going on but I keep catching myself feeling like I'm at the center of some sort of conspiracy plotted against me all caused by missed perceptions or projected ambitions. Well, I'm not Fhtagn'ing around with that wgah'nagl...

Cthulhu on mglw'crap, man!

Nafh fhtagn fnord.. K

Feb 5, 2010

the sleeping lion

I am turning
Turn around face me
As we shuffle
Cards like stars
Like pinholes to heaven
Peeking through
This veiled bankrupt world
Like angels light in dungeons
Hopeful and hungry
As burning torches
A rainbow from a lizard head
Arches over chimney rock
The quiet thunders
In some old canyon
Virtue is on the move
Life and time changing shape
I think to call you out
But I wait
For desert rain is good
Loneliness is strength
Stand with my face to the sky
There is no why
Just life
The passing of moments
I am parched but fine
Cruel is kind
Curse is blessed
I don’t know about the rest
However it is best
Awake the sleeping lion!


flaming geyser

 I think too much.. take everything as a subtle sign meant to gently nudge from the recesses of my mind some sort of blind truth towards the light of my cognitive consciousness, wincing while I brace for its bite. In this way I have sabotaged some of the sweetest moments, cautioned by a careless kiss. It's not my will to be so vexed with every fleeting thought, but beneath me where the surface lies the pressure has been built. If only to blow my mind in time that the truth will never hurt...

Feb 4, 2010

joy to the werld

I'm happy! That's all I really need to say right now.. it's been awhile though since I could even mumble the notion.. not sure why at all but all I know is that life can be GOOD fer sure! LIVE YOUR DREAMS! Those who do not follow their dreams will all but thwart yours... LIVE! Damn you.. You have my blessings by all means. Dunno what you're waiting for but if you think it's just gonna blow then might as well toot yer own damn horn... yep.

Jan 24, 2010

Star Crossed Lovers

I'm astro-geeking again...

See I'm more or less completely astrologically fucked when it comes to love! I just went through a quick comparison of my synastry chart with each of the ex's and/or temporary lovers that I've collected on my account.. Unbelievable how many similarities jumped out at me!! 3 or them had composite Sun in the 12th!? 3 had Venus in the 2nd and 2 Venus in the 8th but see that's not necessarily a good thing at all with me because my Venus is conjunct Merc and opposite my Moon and Saturn... All of them were either Aries or Scorpio rising w/one exception. 2 Moons in Taurus, 2 in Cancer, then of course 2-4 Scorpio, heh. All except for one are pretty damn incompatible with me and he is now happily married w/children.. yay :( I go drink now....

Jan 17, 2010

my Kabbalah Astrology

Characteristics Of Sphere (Sephiroth) And Their Attributes-

Netzach occupies the 7th position in the Tree of Life and it is the sphere that is associated with victory. Netzach represents our inner feelings, our emotions and our sentiments. It reveals our heart felt desires, needs and requirements. The sephira reflects some of the practical aspects of human life and is ruled over by the Guardian angel Haniel. Speaking from an astrological perspective, the position occupied by the Netzach is ruled over by the planet Venus which in turn reflects those things to which we get attracted. The energy of Netzach can be used in analyzing our pleasure and positive aspects of life.

About Your Archangel
Haniel is the angel representing the month of December. Haniel is also known as the 'Angel of Harmonious Love'. This angel of December is generally seen in a green emerald dress with large gray wings carrying a brown lantern. The angel of love, harmony and romance, Haniel brings about peace, balance, beauty, grace and romanticism in our love life. This is the angel who helps us to be kind, compassionate and gentle in all our thoughts, activities and affairs.

Sphere Sign: Netzach

Position In Tree Of Life: 7th

Planetary Ruler: Venus

Archangel: Haniel

Lucky Day: Friday

Color: Green

Wood: Myrtle

Keyword: Victory, Endurance, Prophecy, Eternity

Metal: Copper

Yesod occupies the 9th position in the Tree of Life and it is the sphere that is associated with foundation. Yesod represents the collective soul of mankind. The sephira provides an insight into ourselves and also our life patterns as it reflects our inner thoughts, heart desires, secrets, hopes, fears and apprehensions and is ruled over by the archangel Gabriel. Speaking from an astrological perspective, the position occupied by the Yesod is ruled over by the Sun which in turn reflects our relationship with everybody around us and the way we communicate with others. The energy of Yesod can be used to determine the ways of reacting to the several events of life.

About Your Archangel
The name Gabriel means the 'messenger of God'. Gabriel is the saint who is said to possess feminine power and as per the Bible God wanted her - Gabriel, to be the mother of his son - Jesus. This saint with a wise spirit lends us warmth during the winter season. Ruled by this saint, you are bound to become an actor, reporter, model, singer, musician or journalist. Anything that involves a spiritual dint will attract you and you are very straightforward in expressing your needs and desires. Gabriel acts as the friend, philosopher and guide by giving information on upcoming events, opportunities and changes.

Sphere Sign: Yesod

Position In Tree Of Life: 9th

Planetary Ruler: Moon

Archangel: Gabriel

Lucky Day: Monday

Color: Gray or Silver

Wood: Willow

Keyword: Foundation, Passion, Truth

Metal: Silver

Characteristics Of Path And Its Attributes

Hebrew Letter: Tzaddi, which means hook.

Location: Connecting path between Netzach and Yesod

Tarot Correspondence: The Star

Corresponding Planet: Uranus / Saturn

Yetsiratic Attribution: Constituting Intelligence

Color: Red

Element: Earth

More About Your Sun Sign-

Path Associated With Your Sun Sign: Path Of Tzaddi

Path Of Tzaddi
This is the path of righteousness. It is the path that is mostly followed by givers, bearers, altruists and all those people who selflessly sacrifices the vital things of their life for the others. People following this path are always a grave and serious. The innovators, rebels and geniuses, who always strive to attain the new things of life, find their strength and passion here.

You are a thinker, philosopher and an idealist. You have an even nature with a clear and sound mind. You are jolly and charming. You may not be very forthcoming with your feelings towards other people. Friendship means the world to you. You work well in groups. You have a deep interest in the psychic and occult sciences. You strive to do a lot for the mankind, given your planets favor you. You are diplomatic and can get your views across without hurting anyone. You are sociable and talkative and good company. You are quick witted with a very good sense of humor. You make friends easily and have no trouble keeping them.

Free Kabbalah Square Of Three

Kabbalah Square Of Three finds your planetary numbers which define your nature and personality. This is based on Kabbalah Numerology principles. The first and foremost knowledge of the Kabbalah is to understand the numbers, their properties and virtues. The numbers play an important role in Kabbalah numerology. This tool helps make your Table of Saturn or Fulfillment based on your date of birth.

Asraiya, February 13, 1976, Kabbalah Square Of Three Reading:

Jupiter 3
Sun 1
Mars 9
Venus 6
Moon 7
Mercury 5
Moon 2
Saturn 8
Sun 4

Moon Conjunction Venus
Venus Conjunction Jupiter
Moon Conjunction Venus
Sun Conjunction Moon
Sun Conjunction Jupiter

Whole Character Number is 1

Nature:- Spiritual Number
Planet:- The Sun
This number refers to the importance of retaining one's individuality above everything else. You are well aware of your singularity to the point of being even a snob or being too much self-conscious. This individual streak of mind is good as far as it helps you to be determined, confident and courageous. On the flip side, you run the risk of exerting dominance on others. The inherent egotism of your personality should be checked otherwise you can arouse disgust and similar negative feelings in others.

Jan 12, 2010

Pluto = Kether

Your result for What Planet are You From? Test...

You are from Pluto!

33% Pluto
Well, well.  So you are from Pluto, eh?  I’m not surprised at all. 

Pluto was once considered to be a cold and distant planet and the furthest away from the sun.  Now it is one of the dwarf planets in our solar system.  It was discovered in 1930, and has been quite an enigma.

It’s named after the Roman god Pluto who was originally the god of metals and then also took on the role of god of the underworld.  He had a way of digging things up and bringing them out to the open.  If he was an alien on the planet I’m sure he became quite popular and perhaps even a little bit scary.

But what does this mean about you? 

Well, first off it means that you don’t like secrets.  You will dig until you get to the truth, even if it means that you have to stir things up a bit in order to do it.  You would probably make a great detective.  You tend to notice things around you.

You have a life altering personality about you.  If things aren’t going well you have no trouble pulling out what you think is bad and rebuilding.  You could probably go somewhere totally new and be able to make a new life for yourself without the same problems other people might have.  You have a strong will and are very motivated.

My only hope is that you don’t try to take over the world.  It would never be the same again.  But, on the other hand, maybe that’s not such a bad thing after all.

Jan 6, 2010

the Genius

"This is true enough. In fact, the majority of people who claim to have "seen God," and who no doubt did "see God" just as much as those whom we have quoted, did nothing else.

But perhaps their silence is not a sign of their weakness, but of their strength. Perhaps these "great" men are the failures of humanity; perhaps it would be better to say nothing; perhaps only an unbalanced mind would wish to alter anything or believe in the possibility of altering anything; but there are those who think existence even in heaven intolerable so long as there is one single being who does not share that joy. There are some who may wish to travel back from the very threshold of the bridal chamber to assist belated guests."

-Book 4; part 1

Jan 4, 2010

A Sai Raya

This is the closest reference/origin of my spiritual name & magickal motto I have ever found outside of myself.. and just as I intended it represents the Sun, HGA, or my highest aspect.. well according to an "intemorphic" (lesbian) publishing site who claim to be linked to the original matriarchal religious traditions from 2 aeons ago. I won't say yay or nay to this.. I've caught a glimpse or two before of some past life experiences spent as a Priestess of Isis. It's just that the term "virgin" doesn't mean lesbian any more than it meant asexual nor sexually immature etc...

Sai Raya

Sai Raya is the Sun: the Great Luminary. As such, she is the Janya most immediately assimilable to Dea Herself (although all the Janyati* may be seen as Her Aspects). Her Aristasian name means simply The Lady, as well as The Radiant. Raya is the Aristasian word for Lady (in the Lord sense — there is no such specific word in English). Dea is sometimes addressed as Raya (Lady) even when the specific Aspect of Sai Raya, the Sun, is not intended. Her ancient Greek name is Theia, which is simply the feminine form of God, equivalent to Dea.
Very much might be said about the Sun. She is the Primordial Light, and it goes without saying that the physical luminary that represents Her in the material solar system is but an outward body or symbol of Her, just as the Sacred Mountain may be incarnated in some particular mountain on earth. The modern mind, with its shallow rationalism, finds it hard to grasp how very real is the incarnation of the Sacred Mountain in, say Mount Sinai, Mount Meru or Mount Olympus, how for their respective Traditions they are the one Sacred Mountain. But the Sun is a little simpler to understand, for there is only and can only be one Sun for the whole of terrestrial humanity.
And so materialism can fall into the opposite error — that of confusing the Supernal Sun with Her outward body (and so ludicrously imagining that traditional peoples worship "what we now know to be a ball of gas"). Sai Raya was before there was an earth to light or a Sun to light her. The same may be said of the Moon, and of each of the planets. They are Eternal Principles: principles that existed before our cosmos came into being and that will exist when all the worlds are dust.

When the Cosmic Harmony, or thamë is disrupted in any of Her created worlds, Our Mother God may descend to set affairs aright. Where conditions are favourable, She may even ameliorate the rigours of patriarchal theology. In Kali Yuga it is metaphysically necessary that she should do so in Her form as the Warrior Queen. Sai Raya incarnated on Earth as The Warrior Queen Raihranya Sai Rayanna

*The seven Great Janyati have often been described in the image of the pure white (or colourless) light of Dea striking the Water of Manifestation and refracting into the seven streams of colour. Of these the first, and closest to the pure Light is that of Sai Raya.

Dialogue be damned

Whenever I reflect upon my short comings, paranoid thinking due to incidents of abuse in my formative years that shattered my trust, and the...